Self pity

Ok so yesterday I was feeling a little...lets see....self pity maybe. After yelling at people I truly care about and walking around with my head down all week I realize that's not how I want to be. It's not the Christian way to be. Ok, so he has moved on and I havent, big deal. I may have lost an amazing friend but I still have my dignity, my health my family and a whole lot of other friends that do want me in their life. I just don't know why this feeling hurts so bad, wanting something you know you can't have or in my case wanting someone that doesn't want me back. I know...someone needs to offfer me some cheese to go with my whine or better yet just offer me a glass of real wine and tell me to get over it and deal with it!

Why?

Why is it that the men we fall in love with are not really the best ones for us but the good guys that are interested in us, we push them away? It's been a year now and I can't seem to let go or move on from a relationship I thought was perfect. I want to be able to move on but I feel stuck! Life is so confusing, sometimes I think I just want to settle down reguardless just so I will have someone to share my life with......but then I stop and think how pety that sounds. I'm better than that and deserve more in life than just settling. Next time around I want it all! I want the "Pretty Woman" fairy tale ending. If I can just be patient I know he is out there ...some where...hopefully.